Do You See Me? The Hidden Power of Small Gestures at Work.

Like most people, I’ve had moments in my career when I felt truly seen—and moments when I felt invisible. What’s always struck me is how often those defining moments weren’t tied to a big speech, a promotion, or a formal recognition. Instead, they were found in the littlest of things:

• A leader who stopped typing when I entered their office and gave me their full attention.

• A coworker who remembered a detail about my life and followed up weeks later.

• A co-worker who walked through a crowded happy hour and invited me to sit with their group because they knew that my worst nightmare is engaging in small talk.

And, just as vividly, I remember the times that told me the opposite:

• A meeting where my voice was drowned out by side conversations.

• A video call where half the attendees were obviously multitasking.

• The boss, who no matter how many times I’ve shared, can’t remember the names of my kids.

I’ll admit it, these are small things. But they tell us everything about whether we belong.

Attention is the Ultimate Act of Respect

We live in an era of distraction. Slack notifications, email pings, and never-ending to-do lists pull us in a hundred directions at once. But when someone speaks to you—whether in person or on Zoom—the decision to stop, look, and listen is a signal: I see you. You matter.

Think about the last time you spoke to someone who was half-listening. Maybe they were scrolling through emails while nodding absentmindedly. Maybe they responded with a generic “Got it” that made it clear they didn’t actually process what you said. How did that make you feel?

Now think about the opposite: Someone who turned away from their computer, invited you in, and gave you their undivided attention. It’s a small action, but in that moment, you felt heard. Valued.

We often underestimate how much presence matters. But the truth is, every time we choose to be fully present, we’re telling someone: You belong here.

The Silent Language of Inclusion

Belonging isn’t always spoken—it’s felt.

It’s when someone remembers your name, goes out of their way to say hello, says something as simple as, “I’ve been meaning to tell you ____”.  The unspoken message it conveys? You’re welcome here. It’s in the warm greeting that acknowledges someone’s presence instead of letting them slip into the background. It’s in remembering a personal detail—"How was your daughter's recital?"—and bringing it up later.

People don’t need grand gestures to feel included. They just need to know that who they are and what they contribute isn’t going unnoticed.

Remote Work Has Made This Harder (But Not Impossible)

With so many of us working remotely, it’s easy to let small moments of connection slip. Video calls often feel transactional. Slack messages replace real conversations. And without intentionality, people can start to feel like faceless names in a chat box.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. A few simple shifts can make a world of difference:

✅ Be fully present on video calls. Close unnecessary tabs. Nod, react, and engage as you would in person.  Ask questions!  And pro tip – they don’t all have to be about work. 

✅ Acknowledge people when they join. A quick “Hey, [Name]—good to see you!” sets the tone.

✅ Pick up the (gasp!) phone. Sure you could Slack that three paragraph message, but maybe consider picking up the phone to share your thoughts in person. And since you're calling, start the conversation with something not related to work.

✅ Follow up on personal details. If someone mentioned they were moving, ask how it went. It matters.

The Little Things Aren’t So Little

A long time ago I worked at a company whose culture was rooted in the Ritz Carlton hotel’s anticipatory service model.  Referred to as “Radar On, Antenna Up”, we were all trained and encouraged to be on the lookout for ways we could create delightful experiences for one another in the simplest of ways. 

It didn’t have to be a grand gesture.  It just had to be authentic.  The intention was to let someone know they were seen and valued.  It included things like …

☀️Bringing back a sandwich for someone who couldn’t join you for lunch because they were working against a deadline. 

☀️Leaving a sticky note on a stressed-out co-worker’s computer monitor that says “Hang in there – you’ve got this!”

☀️Creating a handmade card for someone who lost a favorite pet.

When put together, all of these micro-moments created a culture of caring, thoughtfulness, and authenticity.  It makes us each a little more human in a world that grows increasingly cold, cruel, and isolated with every passing day.

People won’t always remember the big speeches, the flashy perks, or even the words you say. But they will always remember these moment of being seen.

And in a world where so many feel unseen, that might be the most powerful thing we can give.